Ryan Spencer - The Independent Florida Alligator

OPINION | COLUMNS

Columnist offers final observations

By Ryan Spencer | Apr. 18, 2010

Ah, my last column of the semester — and my last semester at that. I suppose this is where I get all sentimental in my undergraduate reflection, perhaps mustering enough good will to radiate advice out to some of the younger Gators among us. How quaint that would be, but any knowledge I’d be kicking wouldn’t exactly be worthy of an AAA rating. Plus, I’m not that generous. I guess the matter comes down to just how cliché I’m willing to allow myself to be. Answer: very.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Bagram, Kandahar stops on Lame Train

By Ryan Spencer | Apr. 11, 2010

If you’ve been hearing a low rumble or seeing a faint column of smoke off in the distance, perhaps traveling in the direction of Afghanistan, be alarmed.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Religion debate won’t make progress

By Ryan Spencer | Apr. 4, 2010

On Tuesday, Gainesville will get a glimpse of the increasingly popular God-concentrated argumentative cavalcade appearing in many of the auditoriums across the country and the world, the local showcase the Accent speaker’s bureau has dubbed The Great Religion Debate. These loosely related, independently organized events have made celebrities out of their dialectical pugilists, among them Richard Dawkins, William Lane Craig and Shmuley Boteach, although I must admit it seems the notoriety gained from these debates is severely biased toward the atheistic side of the podium. Is it infamy more than fame, the relative lameness of their theist counterparts or simply their writing of more entertaining books? I’m sure we’ll find out.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Current events bring sense of deja vu

By Ryan Spencer | Mar. 28, 2010

Rarely is this question posed: Have I unknowingly been in the hot tub time machine or has the past week or so been a really wicked case of déjà vu? I have recently been asking myself this as a series of seemingly long-exhausted events came to an incredibly startling — OK, slightly entertaining — temporal intersection.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Lawyers in 9/11 case embody America

By Ryan Spencer | Mar. 21, 2010

The class-action lawsuit against the city of New York concerning the ground zero response and cleanup effort suffered another setback last week. U.S. District Judge Alvin Hellerstein handed down a decision stating the lawsuit’s roughly $600 million settlement, filed on behalf of about more than 10,000 ailing first responders and workers who searched for survivors and cleared the wreckage after the Sept. 11 attacks, would be inadequate. He went further to delineate the settlement’s convoluted compensation allotment system and grossly excessive attorney fees as reasons for his recommendation to restructure the settlement. Hellerstein maintained the compensation paled in comparison to the effort displayed, hazardous conditions endured and compensation truly deserved by the plaintiffs, whom he made a point to refer to as heroes.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Alligator Columnist plans to build dinosaur park

By Ryan Spencer | Mar. 14, 2010

Abandoning the typical weeklong alcohol/Gatorade cycle set against a backdrop of sandy shorelines (or, less frequently, powder-laden slopes), I sipped not on ‘tron, but water, and did so in the confines of my own backyard. Had I adopted a new sense of responsibility for my health? Was it a case of middle school-reminiscent yardwork mandated by my parents, or was it perhaps HGTV-triggered gardening mania? Don’t be ridiculous — I’ve got two words for you: dinosaur cage.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Our generation too quick to diagnose

By Ryan Spencer | Feb. 28, 2010

Last Thursday, just when I was about to align myself with the Editorial Board’s defense against elder generations’ grumblings about the lay of the 21st century land, I stumbled upon a preview of the American Psychiatric Association’s DSM-5, or the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Now, I’m standing with our Golden Folks on their side of the issue, although their stance in this matter has less to do with our generation’s intelligence and more to do with society’s ever-flaccidifying grit.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Celebrities held to double standards

By Ryan Spencer | Feb. 21, 2010

An issue that plagued me considerably last year has recently resurfaced with the addition of wide receiver Donté Stallworth to the roster of the NFL’s Baltimore Ravens. Stallworth, who nabbed passes for the Cleveland Browns during the 2008 season, was arrested in March of 2009 and charged with DUI manslaughter after hitting 59-year-old Mario Reyes. This event garnered a modest amount of media coverage and paled in comparison to the circus surrounding the Michael Vick case. It’s this disparity in coverage and, more specifically, public outrage that’s at the root of my dismay.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Danger nothing new in Winter Olympics

By Ryan Spencer | Feb. 14, 2010

There was a considerable amount of finger pointing last week after Georgian luger Nodar Kumaritashvili died during a practice run for the Winter Olympics in Vancouver. I saw the video of the crash in which Kumaritashvili flew from his luge after exiting a turn over the 4-foot edge of the track, bounced off a rail and finally smashed head first into a support column – from a speed over 80 mph. He died before arriving at the hospital.

OPINION | COLUMNS

Palin taking ‘retard’ comment too far

By Ryan Spencer | Feb. 7, 2010

Well, it finally happened. I suppose it was only a matter of time before one of White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel’s well-rumored, profanity-laced harangues would surface while he was in office. Indeed, it was only a snippet of his Chicago-sharpened talent, but it was worth the wait.