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Wednesday, November 27, 2024

At UF, grocery shopping is often done at one of the many P.O.D. Markets on campus. Many students don’t spare a thought about the cost of their shopping sprees, and those who do often write off the obvious overcharging as an acceptable price for convenience. I suspected, however, that the difference could not be so miniscule, and after employing some expert espionage, infiltrating various P.O.D. Markets, I have uncovered the shocking extent of this convenience store con.

Imagine a generic Gator, using his or her parents’ money to buy sustenance for the week. It is not the typical image of an extortion victim. However, the harsh reality is that this unassuming college student is being swindled out of vast amounts of his or her hereditary creditors’ cash. Say our student wants to start the day off right with a morning classic, Cap’n Crunch. How could they go wrong with such a wholesome and nutritious breakfast? Well, they could start by purchasing the cereal at a P.O.D. Market. There, our student would be charged $6.19 for a measly 14 ounces of Cap’n Crunch, yet Walmart offers a 28-ounce box for $3.98. While Capt. Horatio Magellan Crunch’s cereal provides many nutrients, protein is needed in order to complete a balanced breakfast. So, our student naively navigates to the bacon in the back of the P.O.D. Market. Another mistake. The pitiful 5-ounce portion of bacon distributed at P.O.D. Markets will deal our student’s wallet a heavy blow of $5.79. However, in the Elysian Fields of the local Walmart, a 16-ounce package can be purchased for $4.89. A sizable amount of damage has already been dealt to our student, and yet more still is to come as he or she decides to stock up on a preeminent college snack: Pop-Tarts. As a Gator with taste, our student disregards the brittle brown sugar cinnamon and the sickening strawberry flavors, sifting through the dross to strike gold with the hot fudge sundae flavor. Sadly, our student goes to the P.O.D. Market yet again and is charged a whopping $3.79 for a total of two toasted pastries, a price which gets curb-stomped by Walmart’s $1.98 for a box of eight. The P.O.D. Market employs advanced chicanery, wherein they charge you more for less. This could be considered cruel, or just capitalism; either way, our student is losing out on copious amounts of money and Pop-Tarts. 

To finish the analysis, let’s suppose our student gets thirsty (most college students do) and wants to indulge in a delectable drink. Maybe our student is vegan, I wouldn’t judge them, and they decided to go for a glass of almond milk. Lucky for them, the P.O.D. Market carries almond milk by the half-gallon for the low price of $5.79! Too bad there isn’t a huge corporate chain of supermarkets that sells the same half-gallon Silk almond milk for just $2.98.  Except that there is. It’s called Walmart. Perhaps our student is no ordinary vegan, they are a proud vegan member of the great Gator Nation. So, on their parade through the P.O.D. Market, it is not the almond milk but the Gatorade that catches their eye. The 64-ounce bottle will run our student $3.99, but the university-sanctioned P.O.D. Market could not possibly price-gouge on our hallmark commodity, right? Absolutely, unquestionably wrong. In the land of low prices, at the Butler Plaza Walmart, the same 64-ounce bottle costs only $2.19.

I have outlined just a few egregious examples, yet by no means have I covered all of the corruption of the P.O.D. Markets that dot UF’s campus. Preying on students without the willpower or horsepower to go off campus for groceries, these little stores serve as a massive financial drain on UF’s student body. Students should never shop in the P.O.D. Markets unless they are trying to throw away money, in which case you still shouldn’t because I will gladly take your money. Maybe then I’d finally be able to afford a box of Cap’n Crunch at the P.O.D. Market. 

Kyle Cunningham is a UF English and history double major. His column appears on Mondays.

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