Ah, Student Government election season.
And it couldn't have come at a better time. The battle over the "porkubus" stimulus bill is over, President Barack Obama is sending more troops into Afghanistan to fight the war on terror, and newspapers are calling on Sen. Roland Burris to resign in light of new corruption scandals. Conservatives don't have much else to write about.
Not that SG is much to write about, either. Yes, SG controls a sizable budget, but unfortunately the lasting implications of any decision they make are just not that significant. Congresses are inherently slow moving, inefficient and wrought with compromise.
Obama's stimulus bill, for example, was originally supposed to be about $100 billion larger and include a great deal more government spending. Despite overwhelming support in both houses, the final bill ended up watered-down and littered with pork-barrel spending.
Like it or not, this is the way government was meant to function. The people who wrote the Constitution feared government rather than trusted it to solve all of their problems. They sought a slow-moving Congress that couldn't infringe on their rights in the same way as a super-efficient English tyrant.
For those of us who still don't like government, this slow movement keeps government subordinate to the people. We don't want a government that will immediately respond to every little problem in America rather than let people and the market sort out their own problems. My favorite words in the Constitution are the first five of the First Amendment: "Congress shall make no law."
So why do we expect SG to be any different?
Even the SG campaigns are just as bad as the real-world ones. Mudslinging has been rampant, especially in pithy tactics like those employed by the Orange and Blue Party in filing otherwise trivial complaints against the Progress Party.
The Orange and Blue Party campaigned last fall and spring on the promise of change, and its most significant accomplishment was the resignation of a Gator Party senator. The Progress Party promises "insourcing" that aside from being a socialistic idea reminiscent of protectionism at the expense of efficiency is fairly unfeasible for any minority party to accomplish in the current SG establishment. The Unite Party promises that everything will be great if we just "unite."
Will it happen? We shall see…
So for the upcoming SG election, I endorse your friends. Vote for the people you know are running and who would be capable legislators. Don't waste your time voting down the party lines hoping for any real sort of change from anybody. Everyone will give you more of the same - more bickering, more twiddling, and more minor legislation with little if any lasting benefit.
No matter how much people try to stop it, SG is still government, and government is inevitably going to screw up. So have fun campaigning, good luck if you're running, and stop asking me to vote for your party.
Johnathan Lott is a political science and economics sophomore. His column appears on Thursdays.
