Jerry Seinfeld brought his knack for twisting life's little dilemmas about nothing into big laughs to Gainesville on Friday night.
Seinfeld - the creator, star and eventual producer of the popular '90s NBC sitcom of "Seinfeld" - entertained two full houses at the Phillips Center for the Performing Arts.
After jogging to the microphone and waiting for the crowd's standing ovation to die down to start his second show of the night, Seinfeld teasingly asked audience members how they handled the excitement of living in Gainesville.
"The vegetation, the Gator logos - do you ever get tired of it?" he asked.
Seinfeld told the audience that he had not performed here since 1988's Gator Growl.
Like in his sitcom that made him famous, he joked about everyday minutiae, like drug commercials, nursing homes, dying cell phones, cereal and garage junk.
The comedian divulged his love for Cinnabon and said he denied the possibility of an obesity phenomenon in the United States.
"I don't think we have a weight problem until we're all physically touching each other all the time," he said.
The country's "coffee culture" obsession wasn't safe from Seinfeld's quips either, as he mocked the pompous nature of latte-wielding pedestrians.
"I know people that are stopping for coffee on the way to Starbucks," he said.
After making fun of the "paranoia features" on the iPhone, such as the "lock" function, Seinfeld said he didn't want a phone he couldn't slam down.
He returned to the stage after his performance for a question-and-answer session. Audience members asked the comedian a few personal questions, including who he was voting for. He responded, "Whoever lies the best."
When asked what animal he would be if he had the choice, Seinfeld appeased the crowd by imitating the very motion he claimed to be sick of after one day: a gator chomp.