Darts and Laurels for July 25

The last thing you want to do right now is go outside, but your dog needs a walk. You grab the leash, clip it to your furry friend’s collar and get ready for the heat and humidity to hit. It’s actually not too bad today, so you feel you might give your dog the walk she deserves. Two miles later, you return to your apartment feeling accomplished and worthy of calling yourself an above average pet owner. As you get to the pathetic, small grass area around your apartment, you can’t believe your eyes. Someone “forgot” to pick up after their dog. The worse part: it kind of spells something out….

Darts & Laurels

Forever 21 has taken it upon itself not only to deliver the summer’s weirdest styles but also to supply diet bars to customers. Some customers were given Atkins sample bars in their shipments. Atkins is a weight loss brand known for its low-carbohydrate foods. A dart goes to Forever 21 for thinking for even one second this was a smart idea. No one asked for these bars with their clothing order. Although on social media it seemed the bars were being sent with orders of plus-sized clothing, Forever 21 said the samples were sent with orders of all types of sizing. It is safe to say companies should keep quiet about customers’ diets. 

In other food-where-it-shouldn’t-be news, a perfectly kept In-n-Out Burger was found on the street… in New York City. Did we mention In-n-Out is a predominantly West Coast food chain? The closest location to New York City is more than 1,500 miles away. So, yes, it is bizarre to say the least how a pristine double-double burger ended up in the streets of Jamaica, Queens. We are giving a laurel to this bona fide miracle (or amazing publicity stunt).

A dart goesto the “Cat’s” trailer because after watching it, not only are we scared, we can’t look at cats or humans the same way. The movie is yet to come out, so there is still hope for the singing, dancing and general magnificence of director Tom Hooper to save us from this CGI creepiness. But after so many disappointing attempts at live-action remakes this past year (we’re looking at you, “Aladdin”), we should be conditioned for just about anything once the movie comes out around the holiday season. 

“Blade Runner” actor Rutger Hauger has died at the age of 75. The Dutch cult actor died Friday after a short illness. Hauger appeared in “True Blood” and Christopher Nolan’s “Batman Begins.” He founded an AIDS awareness organization called the Rutger Hauer Starfish Association. A laurel goes out to his memory.  

A design flaw in Facebook’s Messenger Kids app allowed thousands of chats with unauthorized users, according to the Verge. The whole point of the app is for children to talk to only users approved by their parents. But in a group chat, the protection can be avoided. Children can enter a group chat with unapproved users thanks to the design flaw. A dart goes to Facebook for this flaw because the app is designed for children under the age of 13. This comes around the same time the Federal Trade Commission announced on Wednesday that Facebook CEO, Mark Zuckerberg, will be personally responsible for any future privacy cases.  

Three attorneys commissioned by Puerto Rico’s House of Representatives found five impeachable offenses for Gov. Ricardo Rosselló, according to Telemundo. This comes after 12 days of protest, one of the largest ever for the island. On Saturday, 900 pages of group chat messages between the governor and his close associates showed homophobic and misogynistic comments. We are giving a dart to the governor, as he and those in the group chat, but a laurel to the protesters in Puerto Rico for making their voices heard in a time of political mayhem. 

The Alligator Editorial Board includes the Opinions Editor Jackie De Freitas, Editor-in-Chief Mark Stine and managing editors Hannah Beatty and Lindsey Breneman.