Istill remember every detail from the day I moved into my freshman dorm.
On Aug. 15, 2015. As I got out of my mom’s overpacked Jeep, the Gainesville air was thick and humid, as usual. I timidly observed the other students I would later get to know later on. My dad grabbed the minifridge from the back of my mom’s car and lifted it up with ease before he sprinted up the stairs with it. He still likes to brag about how he was in better shape than all of the other parents. As I took in the scene, it all felt surreal. College seemed just the way I imagined it.
The next few weeks continued to meet all of my preconceived notions of what my UF college experience would look like. I went through sorority rush, found my “home,” went to my first big party and got my first hangover breakfast at Bagels and Noodles. I decided on a favorite library (I’m a Marston girl, through and through) and I made a big group of friends I did everything with. I remember thinking to myself, this is what it would be like for the next four years — exactly like I planned.
While I relished in the glamour of freshly minted college life, older friends of mine assured me that it would only get better. I watched my friends in their senior years gallivant around campus with their tight-knit group of friends without a care in the world. From the outside, it looked easy. Oddly enough, they left out the struggles they’d faced over the past four years and that sometimes, college sucks. So, as a naive freshman, I believed them when they said senior year would be fun.
Unfortunately, I didn’t just believe this lie, I believed the lies I told myself as a freshman, too. I had a vision for the next four years. I believed that I’d never fall off course. I couldn’t have been more wrong.
As I’m sure you expected, things didn’t go according to plan. It was a turbulent four years, but it gave me exactly what I needed.
I made close groups of friends, but I also lost some friends when I realized they weren’t good for me. I tried the party scene and found out I much prefer being in bed by 11 p.m. I dropped out of my sorority after I came to the heartbreaking realization that I hated just about everything Greek life actually stood for. I dated a few boys I swore were “the one,” only to get bored and change my mind weeks later. I changed my major a few times and drove my parents insane when I called them every few weeks with a new career path I was “sure about this time.” A lot of things changed and a lot of things didn’t go the way I wanted them to. But, each step I took off of my ideal path helped me grow.
So, here I am: three months away from graduation and my life is nothing like I thought it would be. Everything I believed as a freshman about where I would be right now was totally off base. But there is nothing wrong with that.
To the freshmen out there, please let go of your expectations. There are more important things to accomplish during your time at UF. Don’t hold on to toxic friends or boring relationships just because you want to graduate next to your freshman year besties. Don’t stick with a major that makes you miserable. Don’t be scared to change your mind about something you thought you loved. And most importantly, don’t believe the lies you told yourself about what your college experience would look like. These next four years will give you exactly what you need, even if you don’t know what that is yet.
Abigail Miller is a UF political science and journalism senior. Her column appears on Mondays.
