We get by with help from our friends: It’s important to be selfless sometimes

The human race is intrinsically a selfish bunch. When we’re born, we are strictly self-serving. We exist only to keep ourselves alive and to advance ourselves to the point where we can do this without help. We communicate our needs by crying, screaming or doing whatever it takes to get our parents’ attention, and once this is complete, we just head on back to whatever we were doing before we decided we needed something.

Now, of course, I don’t blame babies. I love babies. They’re great. They have a lot of needs, though, and haven’t yet gained the conscious to consider other people. However, once we have passed the age of complete, undeniable dependency on other people, we learn how to think about others, too.

Or, should I say, ideally we learn to think about others. It is immensely important to think about yourself. You are your vessel for navigating the world. It seems obvious, but you must remember to take care of yourself and make sure you have what you need to succeed. However, without the people who make you happy and who have helped shape you, there is no you either.

We must remember what we as individuals want and how we feel are not the only things that matter. You are one of seven billion. That one is significant, but one all the same. As we grow older, we adopt different roles in the lives of others. We begin as son or daughter and maybe sibling. Soon, we become student, friend, significant other, maybe even mentor or parent. I always found it interesting that we so often describe ourselves by our relations to other people. Think about a headstone carving. So many of them list the roles a person played in their loved ones' lives. So readers, I ask you, why are we so selfish sometimes?

I'm not saying you should drop everything whenever someone asks. As I said, you are important, too. But we need to remember that sometimes, we can't all help ourselves. Sometimes, other people need us, and they may need us more than we need of ourselves at that moment. We all have gifts and talents, and if we only use these to help ourselves, we are wasting them.

We cannot get where we want to be without some help. It is wrong to accept help without at least trying to provide it, and it is also wrong to only help when it also helps you or when it is convenient. The people you care about will have problems and need you at times that may not work best for you, but here's the thing: When your people need you, it's no longer about you.

I’ve seen a lot of selfish behavior, but I’ve also seen quite a bit of selfless behavior. I know people who moved thousands of miles from their loved ones to allow their partners to pursue their dreams. I know people who abandoned important commitments because someone they loved needed them. I know mothers and fathers who gave up everything and put their lives on hold because to them, being there for their children was more important than anything else. People take bullets for each other — give their lives solely to save another.

Selflessness is just that: giving of yourself without regard for yourself. You are where you are in life thanks to the selflessness of someone. It can be someone different for everyone, but someone gave of himself or herself at some point to help you. Pay it back, and pay it forward.

Remember that as you look back on your life, you very likely won’t exclusively think about everything you did on your own. Keep your people close.

Taylor Cavaliere is a UF journalism and psychology sophomore. Her column appears on Mondays.