I picked up my first cigarette between my senior year of high school and my freshman year of college. Despite the fact my two best friends had already been smoking for a solid year at that point, I’d always hesitated. After all, it’d been drilled into my head pretty thoroughly that cigarettes provide zero benefits. They’re addictive. They’re expensive. They don’t provide the intoxicating effects of alcohol or other popular drugs of choice. And, of course, they exponentially increase one’s chances of contracting cancer. My first cigarette was a spur-of-the-moment “Why not?” decision, not one built on excitement or anticipation. I threw up immediately after finishing it.
Three years later, cigarettes have become, for better or worse, a critical part of my identity. If you’ve met me at a party, or caught me taking a much-needed break from putting off studying, odds are you’ve seen me with a cigarette in my hand. The reactions to my habit from people around me have ranged from “Ayo Fogman, can I grip a smoke?” to “You’re a disgusting idiot, and I refuse to be associated with someone so stupid that they would consciously choose to smoke in light of the plethora of scientific studies and factual evidence that show cigarettes are bad for you.” I’ll let you guess which one I prefer.
It is particularly difficult to be a college student who smokes at UF, where the administration (intelligently) made the campus a tobacco-free zone in 2010.
So, given the fact it is banned on campus, widely and rightfully stigmatized by a significant portion of the UF student populace and a drain on both my health and my wallet, it would be reasonable to ask: Why do I do it? The answer, to put it simply, is social constructs.
To smoke and be a college student in 2015 is an inherently contradictory proposition. Given you were smart enough to get accepted to a university in the first place, you ought to be smart enough to know not to pick up the damn things, right? Sure, if you’re a well-adjusted person. As The Huffington Post stated plainly in a Feb. 25 article, “Smokers are more likely to suffer from anxiety and depression.” The article notes a recent British study found more than 18 percent of smokers over the age of 40 reported having anxiety and depression, as opposed to 10 percent of non-smokers and 11.3 percent of ex-smokers.
I’ve never been coy about my status as an angst-ridden young man. It is only appropriate then that in smoking cigarettes, you tend to meet kindred spirits.
Over the years, the well-ingrained ritual of stepping outside of a party or building to smoke, bum or share a cigarette has led me to meet more people and make more friends than the casual observer would expect.
I met the woman who is now my significant other when she followed me after I stepped outside a party to have a smoke. The man who is now my best friend and I bonded when we would be the only two to leave a mutual friend’s house to chat over cancer sticks. My roommate, who was only a passing acquaintance in high school, has become one of my good friends after many a stoge sesh. Each and every single one of them is a little bit twisted.
Although the U.S. has done a tremendous job of combating cigarette consumption, it is almost universally accepted that the U.S. has dropped the ball when it comes to how it treats and corrects issues pertaining to mental health. While I won’t speak for my friends, I will absolutely draw a connection between my mental health and cigarette usage.
Addressing the last of a dying breed — meaning young smokers — means addressing how colleges and the nation at large provide aid to those suffering from anxiety and depression. UF faculty can remind students about its status as a tobacco-free campus all they want, but I can guarantee Smoker’s Row — what I’ve come to call the area of campus adjacent to Midtown — will still be there tomorrow.
There was a solid month in 2014 where I had effectively kicked the habit. I’m looking forward to the day I do it permanently.
Zach Schlein is a UF political science junior. His column appears on Fridays.
[A version of this story ran on page 7 on 3/26/2015 under the headline “Smoking cigarettes is much harder than it looks”]