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Wednesday, December 04, 2024

This is probably going to be an unpopular opinion because I am siding against the all-powerful Beyoncé, but give me a chance to explain myself. The iconic recording artist, along with other well-known women like Jennifer Garner, Jane Lynch and Condoleezza Rice, has joined Girl Scouts of the USA and Lean In in a campaign to ban the word “bossy.”

In a video promoting the effort, Beyoncé says, “I’m not bossy. I’m the boss.” Now some of you “Beys” may want to call me the other b-word right now for criticizing your idol, but that’s OK. I would simply reappropriate the slander and wear it with pride — which is what I think people should do with the word “bossy.”

Now, Girl Scouts has a lot of good things going for it — Thin Mints, Samoas, Tagalongs, Do-si-dos — and, of course, it develops self-confidence and good decision-making in girls. This “Ban Bossy” initiative draws attention to the sexism often attached to the word; when I Google the definition of “bossy,” the first example sentence to pop up uses the pronoun “she.”

“She was headlong, bossy, scared of nobody and full of vinegar,” says the Oxford Dictionary. Using the word to primarily describe the actions of a woman is a trend that continues on Urban Dictionary, across the Web and in our thoughts and conversations.

“A 2008 survey by the Girl Scouts of nearly 4,000 boys and girls found that girls between the ages of 8 and 17 avoid leadership roles for fear that they will be labeled ‘bossy’ or disliked by their peers,” according to Sheryl Sandberg and Anna Maria Chavez in a Wall Street Journal article.

However, I don’t think this gender gap is going to be closed by eliminating a word from our lexicon. There will always be other words people can use to belittle assertive women, such as “emotional,” “shrill,” “high-strung,” etc.

Instead, I think we should follow in the less majestic footsteps of another feminist icon and funny gal, Tina Fey. Fey owns her bossiness rather than banishing it; she even titled her memoir, “Bossypants,” in which she advises, “Don’t waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions; go over, under, through, and opinions will change organically when you’re the boss. Or they won’t. Who cares? Do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.”

Rather than ridding our language of a word, we should try to change the perception of it. This has been done with other words that have previously been used negatively but have now been adapted into positive terms, such as “nerd” and “geek.”

Similarly with “bossy,” when I Google “nerd,” definitions often use example sentences with the pronoun “he.”

“Nerd” has been primarily used to mock boys with less-than-impressive physiques and athletic prowess who are more interested in academic pursuits, but lately this image has transformed. Now, when I think of nerds, I think less Steve Urkel of “Family Matters,” and more of John and Hank Green of Nerdfighters, Wired magazine, Steve Jobs, “Doctor Who” and Natalie Portman wearing a “Star Wars” shirt. I would say being a nerd is even trendy.

So no matter what someone calls you, you can choose how you wish to perceive that label.

As Beyoncé once said, “Your self-worth is determined by you. You don’t have to depend on someone telling you who you are.”

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[Lauren Adamson is a UF journalism junior. Her columns appear on Tuesdays. A version of this column ran on page 7 on 3/18/2014 under the headline "We should embrace, not ban, ‘bossy’"]

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