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Sunday, November 10, 2024

Ed. note: Due to its subject matter, this column uses strong language.

Corinne Fisher and Krystyna Hutchinson want you to know that slut-shaming isn’t OK.

In their podcast, “Guys We F**ked, The Anti Slut-Shaming Podcast,” they discuss, obviously, the guys they’ve had sex with in order to fight the stigma of being a slut.

The podcast “encourages women to feel more comfortable with themselves and everyone to have more great, shame-free sex,” according to a Huffington Post article.

Count me in for anything that spreads awareness of the negative repercussions of labeling others as sluts.

The concept of slut-shaming isn’t new. It’s a societal construct that shames women for how much sex they are — or aren’t — having.

It teaches women that sex is bad and reinforces the idea that self-worth, in addition to your societal value, is based on your sex life.

We’ve created an impossible environment to succeed in because shaming women adds fuel to the fire that is the Madonna-whore complex.

In that line of thought, there are only two options: Women can either be saintly and pure Madonnas or dirty, sexually experienced whores. You can thank Freud for ignoring all the other sexual possibilities available to women.

This creates a world of sexual oppression for women. Madonnas are respected but cannot engage in sex, and whores are desired but treated as second-class citizens.

Essentially, there’s no way for a woman to win this game.

This creates an even bigger problem: There are no set criteria for being a Madonna or a whore.

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Things would be a lot easier if there were an equation for it. You hook up with X-amount of people in Y-amount of time and then wham, bam, thank you, ma’am: You’re a slut.

But it doesn’t work that way because the label is highly subjective.

I’ve heard Taylor Swift labeled as such for having four boyfriends in a year, and Miley Cyrus called the same for twerking. Those are two very different actions, but apparently both can earn you the “slut” label.

Use of the word has gotten so out of control that you can earn it for almost everything.

Basing the label on a certain number of sexual partners doesn’t work, either.

My number may be higher than some, thus making me more deserving of the label than anyone to ever have lived. At the same time, my number could be less than others, making me an innocent Girl Scout.

I have never understood slut-shaming quite simply because I don’t understand what is so awful about being a so-called “slut.”

Sex is healthy and fun, and as long as you are doing it with consent and protection, there is no reason to be ashamed.

Moreover, there is no reason to shame other people for what they do in the bedroom — or on the kitchen counter, living room couch or Florida Field’s 50-yard line. Unless you are involved in the activity, it’s not your business.

However, this is all ignoring another big problem in the slut paradigm: Only females can be sluts.

Slut-shaming is a tool used by the — brace yourself — patriarchy to punish women.

The line of thought says women cannot be promiscuous, but they must have some sexual experience or else they aren’t desirable.

Women cannot enjoy sex because that’s promiscuous, but they also cannot abstain because that’s uptight and prudish.

Men, there’s reason for you to stop using the label as well. It hurts you, too.

Freud gave us the Madonna-whore complex, but we can thank a concept called hegemonic masculinity for this one.

Essentially, men have to strive for an idealized version of masculinity that isn’t actually attainable.

You see, masculinity is a frail thing that constantly needs to be reinforced. And “getting” a lot of girls is a great way to tell the world, “Hey folks, I’m a manly, heterosexual male. Look at my masculinity!”

So while women are told to keep their numbers low, men are taught to keep their numbers as high as possible. You see where this is going, right? The math just doesn’t make sense.

If men keep insulting women for their sexual activity, they will stop having sex. This seems counterproductive to the heterosexual man’s quest to get laid.

So how do we fix this? Well, we can stop using the word “slut,” or we can turn the label into something more positive.

I want to see more of these so-called “sluts,” but I want to see them as happy, successful and respected individuals rather than ashamed and stigmatized women.

The world needs more ladies like Samantha Jones, who show us it’s OK to have a lot of sex. And if that makes us sluts? Well, so be it.

[Robyn Smith is a UF journalism sophomore. Her columns appear on Mondays. A version of this column ran on page 7 on 3/18/2014 under the headline "No one wins when women are criticized"]

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