A good friend of mine carries home a new stack of books from the library every week. She reads all the time, maintains good grades and serves as an event director for one of her extracurriculars. One of my favorite things about her is that, no matter when I ask her to do something, she’s ready. I’ve never heard her say, “I can’t, I’m busy.” She has just as much to do as everyone else but makes time for the things she enjoys, like reading Jacques Lacan and taking photo excursions.
We could all afford to take a page from her book.
At a university such as UF, we’re all accustomed to hectic schedules, but we’ve forgotten that they’re not a requirement. Busyness has become a status symbol. The New York Times column “The ‘Busy’ Trap” captures the essence of this epidemic perfectly, explaining how promoting our busyness builds an illusion of importance both to ourselves and those around us.
What are we Gators if not overachievers? We’re addicted to full planners and Google calendars brimming with to-do’s. We pencil in 45-minute coffee dates with old friends just to lament our chaotic lives. Being too busy — and talking about it — makes us feel important and in demand, as though we didn’t sign ourselves up for most of the items on our lists.
These busy-centric conversations consist of questions like “How have you been?” which are invariably answered with phrases like “crazy busy” and “so stressed.” Cue the battle of one-upping each other on workloads and number of social engagements until both parties sigh, shrug their shoulders and commence describing their level of fatigue. We want our listeners to pity and respect our busy selves all at once, a combination not seen in any other situation, probably because those emotions are completely contradictory.
If we’re so busy — even with schedules packed with trivialities — we must be making progress, right? A list full of places to go and people to see makes our progress toward some abstract future just a little more tangible. We can see our success and so can everyone else.
The Times piece also highlights the use of busyness “as a kind of existential reassurance, a hedge against emptiness.”
If we’re constantly in motion, our lives must be brimming with meaning and purpose. Whether or not the activities we participate in fulfill us, they certainly fill out a day planner, leaving no idle time to feel lonely or bored — or to enjoy life’s little pleasures. Busyness is our society’s newest defense mechanism against emotions that will find us anyway.
We fall victim to the busy trap when we believe we can’t progress unless others can see our struggle too. Those of us who pad our daily schedules with fluff activities should reevaluate how to spend our precious time.
Most importantly, we have to stop perpetuating the idea that whoever is the busiest and most stressed will reap the biggest reward.
That couldn’t be further from the truth.
None of this busyness — whether real, feigned or exaggerated — signals success.
To put it simply, life is too short to be too busy for the wrong reasons.
We must consider our motivations when signing up for that new club or taking on extra hours at work.
Are our reasons for pleasure or a purpose, or might we realize we’re only trying to keep up with the proverbial Joneses?
Katie McPherson is a UF English junior. Her columns run on Tuesdays. A version of this column ran on page 6 on 10/29/2013 under the headline "Stop and smell the roses, busy Gators"
