Welcome back for Summer B!
We hope you enjoyed the fireworks and Fourth of July celebrations as much as we did. Unfortunately, we have no fun holiday to look forward to until Halloween.
That brings us to our we-now-officially-declare-August-19th-Dress-Up-In-Costume-Give-Each-Other-Presents-Shoot-Fireworks-Eat-A-Lot-Of-Chocolate-Awesome-Day edition of...
First, in honor of Independence Day, we throw a let’s-not-pretend-that-your-greatest-hits-album-would-have-more-than-one-song DART at Lee Greenwood’s “God Bless the USA.” It’s a nice gesture, but that song is really one of the worst things ever composed.
Can we stop playing it every Fourth of July and/or patriotic celebration? Thanks.
Next up, we give a go-America-and-go-UF LAUREL to the 16 current and former Gators who qualified for the London Olympics.
Enjoy London and go for the gold.
Although we all know now that Obamacare was upheld by the Supreme Court last week, we have to give a maybe-you-should-be-better-at-your-jobs-and-check-your-facts DART to CNN and eventually Fox News, who mistakenly reported that the individual mandate was found unconstitutional by SCOTUS.
Nice one.
Speaking of things everyone already knows, we give a it’s-actually-kind-of-cool-that-no-one-is-surprised-or-upset LAUREL to Anderson Cooper, who officially came out as being gay.
With little to no uproar, maybe this will inspire more public figures to be more open about their sexuality.
If you save someone’s life, that should be a good thing, right?
Not to the recipient of our it’s-time-to-reevaluate-your-business-model-and-priorities DART at Jeff Ellis and Associates, an Orlando-based lifeguard company. Tomas Lopez, a lifeguard for the company, saved a man from drowning but was fired because he left the section of the beach that his company was paid to patrol.
The company argued that he broke the rules, potentially putting swimmers in his section at risk. Perhaps Jeff Ellis and Associates has never heard of exceptions or common human decency.
Finally, for a potentially huge scientific breakthrough, we give a where’s-Bill-Nye-the-Science-Guy-to-explain-to-us-what-they-found LAUREL to scientists at the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland who believe they have found the Higgs boson, or the “God Particle.”
This particle is believed to help explain what gives objects mass, giving us more insight into the beginning of the universe.
Pretty cool, huh?
Have a fun and safe weekend, and be sure to check back next week.
