Welcome back, everyone. If you’re like us, you turned your brain off during the break and tried to forget about classes and grades. Now, everyone’s got to hit the ground running for the spring semester marathon. We’ve got some catching up to do in the remind-us-why-we-go-to-class-during-drop/add-again edition of... Darts & Laurels.
Because it only took three days for us to start searching the calendar for Spring Break.
If the first day of the semester is normally a headache, Wednesday was a migraine.
For paralyzing our class shopping spree and generally freaking us out, we’re throwing an if-we-don’t-get-the-last-seat-in-that-class-we-need-we’re-going-to-lose-it DART at UF’s Shibboleth Authentication System. We aren’t used to Webmail, ISIS and Sakai failing us in our time of need.
Our politicians, however, are a different story.
The hemming and hawing lawmakers practice seems like second nature to them. So we’re giving a surprising perhaps-continual-layoffs-would-keep-you-on-your-toes LAUREL to the lame-duck session of Congress.
During last month’s race to the finish of the 112th Congress, the folks in Washington addressed tax cuts, the military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, a new START treaty and the Sept. 11 first responders health bill. No matter where you stand on the political spectrum, the glimmer of legislative efficiency looks enticing. We’re not advocating passing laws without due consideration, we just like the thought of our lawmakers doing what their title implies.
You should be worried now that we’ve seen what you can do, Congress.
Of course, the balance of power changed while we were on break. For exchanging her seat in such an awkward manner, we’re throwing a we’ll-never-look-at-a-gavel-the-same-way DART to former Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi.
New Speaker of the House John Boehner set the minority leader up for an overcompensation joke when he chose an oversized gavel for the exchange of power. Pelosi couldn’t help herself, and we started the new Congressional session with a groan.
Maybe we can look forward to “that’s what she said” jokes down the road. Someone might actually watch C-SPAN for that.
Congressional comedy hour isn’t the only thing we’re shaking our heads at. We feel like we’ve gone through every season in the past month, and we’re wondering if Mother Nature is concocting a new one just for us. For making Floridians run back to our apartments for coats or umbrellas, we’re throwing an every-day-is-an-adventure-through-our-closet DART to the weather.
Just pick a temperature already.
The skies were clear in Tampa for New Year’s Day, though. We had nothing obscuring our view of the Gators’ 37-24 win over Penn State.
For sending Urban Meyer out in style, we’re tossing we-knew-you’d-make-it-worthwhile-to-wake-up-after-that-crazy-New-Year’s-Eve-party LAURELS onto the helmets of the UF football team.
And have an extra LAUREL on us, coach. Thanks for the six years of excitement.
That’s all for this week, Gators. Catch you next time.
