Americans are having a lot of sex.
And things are getting freakier and friskier.
The National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, which appeared in the Journal of Sexual Medicine Monday, paints one of the largest and naughtiest images of America’s collective sex life, and some of the results are, well, just keep reading.
America is stretching the limits of its definition of normal and lubing it up with a side of cherry-flavored kinky.
According to the study, respondents participated in a repertoire of more than 40 hide-your-eyes sex acts and positions during their most recent sexual encounter.
Forty? We must be a bunch of prudes, but we got stuck naming positions at about 17. Good work, America! Happy humping!
Fifteen percent of respondents also reported having a sexual history involving at least some same-sex action. Interestingly, only 7 percent of those respondents reported their sexuality as something “other than heterosexual.”
And in a nod to the lovable Bill Clinton and his tagline more famous than “not inhaling,” America seems to also be having a hard (so many puns) time defining what dirty deeds can be called sex.
And the study makes us proud of kiddies across the nation. According to the study, 83 percent of teens reported using a condom during their most recent sexual encounter. But only 22 percent of adult males reported wrapping up.
So keep passing out those free condoms, GatorWell.
And remember, Gators, if you don’t use one, like the 83 percent of teens who do, you will get pregnant, and you will die.
