Dear Jared,
I’m in a long-distance relationship with the guy I’ve been dating for the past three years. We both decided it was cool to hook up with other people as long as we were open about it. Didn’t think it would be a big deal until he actually slept with another girl, and now I just feel like crap about it. Am I a total hypocrite if I break up with him over it? Or should I give this whole relationship thing another whirl?
Sincerely,
Open for Business
To start, maybe you should be closed for business. Perhaps you both should realize you probably aren’t the best for each other if you’re open to someone else double-dipping his tortilla chip in your once-off-limits brand of queso salsa.
It sounds to me things are probably on their way out anyway, so give the relationship thing another whirl. But with a different guy.
And this time, how about we try someone where swing dancing isn’t an option.
And when I say “dancing,” I mean “humping.”
And besides, no one likes sloppy seconds of day-old salsa.
