Hidden inside a fair-trade, raw, organic, vegan health-foods store wearing clothing made from nothing but hemp, Michael Pollan is crying.
“The Omnivore’s Dilemma” author is sure to be in a tizzy about the latest national front-page headlines spreading the whines from those educated Americans who pay more attention to what’s on their plate than what’s on TV.
Food and Drug Administration officials are weighing its options of approving a first-of-its-kind request to market a genetically modified version of salmon that grows twice as fast as its biologically sound counterpart.
The mutant model, sure to be the bee’s knees for those trendy pescetarians, is being called the “Frankenfish” by those environmental radicals who lament such tawdry and radical concerns of ecological destruction, decimation of the natural salmon population and a proliferation of artificial food finding its way to our plates.
Don’t these hippie, tree-hugging, sing-along-time environmentalists know we’re just starting to put a bandage on our still-oozing recession wound?
If we can get cheaper marine-dwelling, mutant pisces faker than a Swedish Fish on our dinner plates, let’s do it.
Who cares about the possibility of these “Frankenfish” inducing extinction for the real deal? When we can make our own fish, who cares about authenticity or nature?
Besides, we Americans already fill our shopping carts with genetically modified (completely fake) crops all the time, and no one gets feisty about that.
What’s a little more fake-fish politics going to hurt?
