Welcome to Florida. Take out your notebook, grab a pen and get ready to take your first class because I’m about to drop some knowledge on the incoming freshmen.
One of the most important and fun elements of your college experience will be going to football games at Ben Hill Griffin Stadium (we’ll start the lesson here: we call it “The Swamp”), so I’m about to arm you with five helpful pieces of advice.
I present to you: Swamptology 101.
Make a block: The only thing better than watching a game with a handful of your closest friends is watching a game with 20 or 30 of your closest friends.
Blocks aren’t just for sororities and frats, anyone can form one by gathering some Gator1s and attending a meeting. The University Athletic Association will say you need a certain amount of people (I think it’s 25. I don’t remember because it’s not important), but they’re very good about working with you if you come up a couple people shy.
Your high fives and chest pounds will significantly increase in a block. The one downside is taking on the role of block leader. For some reason, friends like to make it as hard as possible on you to get them their tickets.
For all you block leaders out there, I’ve been in your shoes, and I’m sorry.
Tailgate: Somewhere. Anywhere. But make sure you tailgate. Set up a grill, grab some beer and get a cornhole set because tailgating is just as much a part of gameday tradition as timeouts and touchdowns.
The first two home games are noon and 12:21 p.m. starts, so I’m going to rock your world: postgame tailgating is not only OK but encouraged in this college town.
Grill out and drink up before heading home to shower and go out on Saturday night. There are plenty of great spots up and down University Avenue and various apartment complexes. Do your homework and find a spot.
Don’t get too drunk: I know, brah, kickoff isn’t for another hour and you can pound six more Genny Lights (if you haven’t experienced Genny Light, let’s just say those six cans will set you back about $2), but you will regret that decision when you’re going on hour three of standing on the bleachers in the 95-degree heat.
When you’re partying the Friday night before a day game, drink a Gatorade before you go to bed and a Vitamin Water Revive when you wake up so you can make it to the game before the end of the first quarter. Don’t be that guy who stumbles into the stadium, falls off the bleachers and throws up all over the bro wearing the Croakies and boat shoes in front of you.
The dude in the red hat is your friend: When the game goes to a commercial (timeouts, end of a quarter, play under review, etc.), an official in a red hat will walk onto the field. This is a powerful man, despite his amusing attire, and the game will start when, and only when, he walks off the field.
Why am I telling you this? After you ignore tip No. 3, you’re going to want to milk those rare sit down opportunities for all they’re worth. While your friends are all standing a minute longer than need be because they don’t know when the action will resume, you can be sure to maximize your sit-down time by keeping tabs on the dude in the red hat.
Learn the players’ numbers: It’s near impossible to read a name off a jersey from 85 rows up, so start getting to know the roster by numbers. Just because the running back takes the ball, that doesn’t mean Jeff Demps was running it. And just because a defensive end sacks the quarterback, that doesn’t mean it was Justin Trattou bringing him down.
In football, you’re allowed to do this thing called “substituting,” so don’t be the one cheering on John Brantley in the fourth quarter of a blowout when Trey Burton is in the game.
For the returning classes, there’s a lot of turnover on the roster, and it’s insulting to both Andre Debose and everyone around you to keep calling him “Wondy.” Yeah, he wears No. 4, but its not funny.
