Pick Column: Vanderbilt

We here at the alligatorSports Brand Picks column know Florida has already punched its ticket to Atlanta, but this weekend will go a long way toward determining who it faces for the Southeastern Conference title.

The winner of the Alabama-LSU matchup will control its destiny in the SEC West, and there's a lot at stake here based on who wins.

Just not for who you'd think.

LSU will COVER THE +7.5 SPREAD because ... Frankly, I can't handle anything other than a Tigers win. I put my big Phil on the Hill reputation on LSU this preseason, telling all who would listen that I thought the Tigers would be good. I actually believed in sophomore quarterback Jordan Jefferson, which should make you pause before listening to a prediction from me ever again. Jefferson averages less passing yards than Tim Tebow (I didn't know that was possible) and has managed a measly 1.9 yards per rush. My best hope is a defensive slugfest - this is the SEC's No. 2 and No. 3 teams in scoring defense - and gambling fool Les Miles gets on a hot streak and finds a way to ruin Nick Saban's season. Everyone would love Miles again, and I would be nearly insufferable to be around. I can't think of a better ending.

- PHIL KEGLER

Alabama will cover the -7.5 spread because … Look, I'll be straight with you.

I'm only in this for a free ride to California.

If the Gators make it to the BCS Championship in Pasadena, I'm running off to Hollywood to pursue my real dream: starring in a movie about a rag-tag group of small-college sportswriters who trade places with the basketball team they cover after the coach and players get fed up with their criticism.

Hilarity ensues - especially in the interview scenes - and we all learn a lot about ourselves in the process.

So far, everything has gone according to plan, as Florida is undefeated and controls its own destiny. But we need insurance in case the Gators lose in the regular season, and that means Alabama has to be undefeated in the SEC Championship so UF can bounce back if something goes wrong.

Phil Kegler is the only one on our staff who doesn't want to be in the movie (he refused the role of the Mark Madsden bench-warming, towel-waving dancing fiend) and wants to rain on our parade.

That's the only reason for picking LSU in this one, as the Crimson Tide will have the home crowd behind it, and there's no way Lord Saban lets his former team spoil the season.

- MIKE McCALL

Now on to the picks!

Sitting atop the standings for another week at 48-41 is Kyle "Baseball season ended in August" Maistri, who skipped the World Series in favor of a marathon viewing of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant." Congratulations, Kyle, you just had a baby in your pants.

Starting a two-way tie for second at 47-42 is Bobby "Get Money, Get Paid" Callovi, who cracked open his piggy bank, got on his Big Wheel and peddled down to the bank, where the teller requested he endorse his check in something other than Macaroni-and-Cheese-colored crayon.

Also in second at 47-42 is the Tampa Tribune's Mike "I'm trapped in a glass case of emotion" DiFerdinando, who is having the worst week of his life because … he passed up a chance to drive to Greenville, N.C. and experience an East Carolina football game on Thursday night.

Checking in at fourth with a 43-46 record is Mike "Josh Haden could easily turn that BC tattoo into ECU" McCall, who made the trip DiFer wasn't willing to in the name of his beloved Pirates. At least they managed three points in front of the home crowd of 12.

Rounding out the top five at 42-47 is the Gainesville Sun's Ed "You can still look swole in winter attire, right?" Aschoff, who does all his jacket shopping in at Baby GAP so his guns can be on full display when it's cold out.

Leading the bottom table and starting a tie for sixth at 41-48 is the Florida Times-Union's Mike "I'm done with this" DiRocco, who performed what can only be described as a near-hissy fit Wednesday after media availability was cut short. One more of those and we're putting you in a nursing home.

Also sitting in sixth at 41-48 is Phil "You ever done NyQuil?" Kegler, who accidently got sauced after coming down with a cold. NyQuil seems innocent until you graduate to the harder stuff - Robitussin and Dimetapp.

Checking in at eighth with a 39-50 record is the Orlando Sentinel's Jeremy "What really goes on in a dogpile?" Fowler, who spent the week having all his male friends jump on top of him and violate him in any way they saw fit. He's a really dedicated journalist.

Sitting in ninth at 37-52 is the Miami Herald's Joe "Gonzo" Goodman, who showed up to the press box at Jacksonville Municipal Stadium in costume as Hunter S. Thompson. He has always written trippy stories that are most enjoyable while on psychedelic drugs, so this was the logical next step.

And continuing his reign in dead-last place with a 32-58 record is the Palm Beach Post's Ben "Filling holes is my specialty" Volin, whose inappropriate double entendres are now being used on us Alligator guys as well. A new level of creepy every week ...

	KM	BC	MD	MM	EA
UL (+20)-WV	WV	UL	WV	WV	WV
SC (+7)-Ark	SC	SC	SC	Ark	SC
BU (+14)-Mizz	BU	Mizz	Mizz	Mizz	Mizz
LSU (+7.5)-Bama	Bama	Bama	Bama	Bama	LSU
UVA (+14)-UM	UM	UM	UM	UM	UM
FSU (+8.5)-Clem	Clem	Clem	FSU	FSU	Clem
Hou (+1)-Tulsa	Hou	Hou	Hou	Hou	Hou
OU (-6)-Neb	OU	OU	OU	OU	OU
USC (-10)-ASU	USC	USC	USC	USC	USC
VU (+35)-UF	VU	UF	VU	VU	VU

	MDR	PK	JF	JG	BV
UL (+20)-WV	WV	WV	WV	WV	WV
SC (+7)-Ark	Ark	Ark	SC	SC	Ark
BU (+14)-Mizz	BU	Mizz	Mizz	Mizz	BU
LSU (+7.5)-Bama	Bama	LSU	Bama	LSU	Bama
UVA (+14)-UM	UM	UM	UM	UVA	UM
FSU (+8.5)-Clem	FSU	FSU	FSU	FSU	FSU
Hou (+1)-Tulsa	Hou	Hou	Hou	Hou	Tulsa
OU (-6)-Neb	OU	OU	OU	OU	Neb
USC (-10)-ASU	USC	USC	USC	ASU	USC
VU (+35)-UF	UF	UF	VU	VU	VU