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Monday, September 16, 2024

In the wake of NBC's decision to cut PETA's risque commercial from the Super Bowl broadcast, animal cruelty awareness hit Gainesville on Monday.

At a local Lowe's hardware store, PETA supporters congregated in full force to protest the sale of glue mousetraps. The major issue with the glue traps stems from the fact mice often suffer significant pain before ultimately meeting their demise.

Perhaps the most impassioned among those in attendance was a bikini-clad young woman sprawled out on the ground. Not only was she scantily clad, she also sported mouse ears as rain fell on her all afternoon.

And who said Disney World was in Orlando?

Curious to find out why the commercial had been cut from Sunday's programming, the Editorial Board did a bit of research and sought out the video online. What we discovered was nothing short of absurd (and awesome). Billed as "Studies show vegetarians have better sex," the advertisement featured luscious lovelies engaging in lewd acts with vegetables.

Porn merchants everywhere had dollar signs in their eyes as suddenly a new fetish sprung up overnight.

As for the lady with the funny ears and swimsuit, we can only hope she takes comfort in the mass of young men who will undoubtedly clip her photo from the Alligator to hang on their walls.

From Pamela Anderson donning an outfit constructed out of lettuce to our feline-fearing friend in Gainesville, adapting the mantra of "sex sells" seems to be a mainstay for PETA's business model.

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