"Long live democracy. In a size 10."
So proclaimed a comment left on an online news article about a fad that seems to be slowly catching on across the globe.
We live in an ever-changing world - one where geese hurl themselves towards airplanes and shoes are chucked at the heads of dignitaries.
Less than two months ago, an Iraqi broadcast journalist named Muntader al-Zaidi catapulted to fame for this shocking act, launching both of his shoes at then-President Bush during a press conference. On Monday, a nameless protester threw his shoe at Chinese Premier Wen Jiabo as he gave a speech on the global economy at Cambridge University.
What can be done to stop these rogue shoes from leaping at the craniums of our heads of state?
Shall we ban them from political talks and force them to wait outside? Is there going to be a need for a loafer and oxford shoe-check at speeches throughout the world now?
Maybe Kryptonite should go from making U-locks for bicycles to patenting a SHU-lock that will secure footwear to the ankles of its wearer while in the presence of dignitaries. Pumps and wingtips can't go very far when they're attached to bodies.
The Cambridge protester's aim was not nearly as accurate as al-Zaidi's. Perhaps he can practice for his next shoe-to-skull encounter by playing the online game Sock and Awe, where players can virtually hone their "Bush-shoeing" skills.
To throw a shoe at someone in the Arab world is to insult to the highest degree. To do so in England probably means you left your knife on your bedside table. Either way, with the Cambridge incident being the second such incident in as many months, it seems that the art of shoe-throwing is not just for your disgruntled journalists anymore.
For al-Zaidi, going down in history as "the guy who threw a shoe at the president's head" put him in jail for up to 15 years, but it also left him a hero to some. Not only was he given a job offer from a Lebanese television channel, he has also received more marriage proposals than he can shake a shoehorn at. A Saudi businessman even went so far as to offer $10 million to buy the shoes, but they were destroyed by Iraqi and American security agents.
A sofa-sized bronze statue replicating one of the destroyed shoes was erected outside an Iraqi orphanage, but was later taken down. This brogue effigy was apparently going against the law of using government property for a political statement. Yet again, a shoe transcends the rulings of the land.
He is not the only one banking on the event, though. The maker of his shoes has seen orders soar over the past few months. This looks like a possible stimulus for the shoe manufacturing industry. It seems that now is a good time to be in that industry, what with people flinging their footwear away left and right.
What's next for this fad, you may ask? I predict more shoe-related violence - drive-by shoe-ings, grand theft sneaker and socketeering, to name a few.
And perhaps now we will see Maxwell Smart's shoe phone in a whole new light.
Naudia Jawad is journalism graduate student. Her column appears on Wednesdays.
