Another year, another group of immature students squirting milk out their noses while laughing at the terrible joke that is "Beat the Cocks."
Listen, kids. It's not funny.
Yes, the Gators are playing a team called the Gamecocks this weekend.
No, that doesn't command you to make a penis joke.
Say it out loud right now. Go ahead. Get it out of your system. Cocks. But please don't bring it up again this weekend.
Every year, without fail, my eyes are subjected to UF fans holding signs with that sophomoric drivel or some variant thereof - "Spurrier loves the Cocks," perhaps, or "Block the Cocks."
Enough already. We get it. They've probably been putting that catchphrase on T-shirts since before your parents were born.
If any of you bring those signs to Saturday's game, you're no better than the opposing fans who bring the oh-so-trite "Teabag Tebow" messages into The Swamp or the countless Southeastern Conference fans who get joy out of adding "-eaux" to every word in their signs the week of an LSU game.
Gators fans are supposed to be better than that, supposed to be above the commonplace abuse that every other school surely throws in the Gamecocks' direction. I know you can do better.
There has got to be a cleverer phrase out there than "Beat the Cocks," or at least a more original one. Might I suggest doing something with the name of South Carolina's junior cornerback, Captain Munnerlyn? Or how about taunting place kicker Ryan Succop after his three-blocked-kick performance in The Swamp two years ago?
You should definitely stay away from the predictable insult-hurling at quarterback Chris Smelley. He's surely been getting that all his life, and those taunts will also be unfunny.
And I'll tell you what else is not a laughing matter - this South Carolina team.
At what point in the week did you realize this team is the No. 24 unit in the country? Monday? Wednesday? Just now when you read that sentence? The Gamecocks really snuck into the rankings and have not been in the top 25 since they were No. 24 on Aug. 31, way back in week 1.
They've even managed to eke out a spot in the BCS rankings this week, clocking in at 25.
If the voters in the polls are showing the Gamecocks some respect, you should, too.
They have the second-ranked rush and pass defenses in the SEC and the No. 1 total defense.
South Carolina is also coached by Steve Spurrier. You just know he's going to come into Gainesville with a few tricks up his sleeve. He is currently interchanging his quarterback every other play, something that could give the Gators headaches Saturday.
Don't be surprised at a few flea-flickers or Miami Dolphins-style Wildcat plays. Their second quarterback, redshirt freshman Stephen Garcia, is the team's second-leading rusher.
I'm not foolish enough to suggest UF is going to lose this game, but I will say that everything sets up perfectly for a sneaky defeat. South Carolina played the Gators close back in 2006 in Gainesville, and junior linebacker Eric Norwood leads the SEC in sacks.
And there's nothing funny about that.
