We here at the alligatorSports Brand Picks Column understand how much college kids enjoy drinking alcohol.
And while reading about alcohol may not be nearly as fun for you, we went and talked to a bourbon distillery just to make sure.
Kentucky, home to the Wildcats, is also where, according to this week's guest, 98 percent of all bourbon in the world is distilled.
Aggie Hutchins, a bourbon specialist at the Maker's Mark visitor's center in Loretto, Kent., has worked there for seven months after a two-year sabbatical from the bourbon business.
She credits the limestone shelf on which Kentucky sits for making it such a great place for bourbon. The limestone takes iron out of the bourbon, which would turn the spirit black and make it visually unappealing.
How about making some of your own bourbon with water from a Gainesville river, or even Lake Alice?
"You could do that, but you're going to have different flavor, the chemicals in the water, nothing to treat it with," Hutchins said. "You're going to have some issues."
The Maker's Mark distillery has been around since 1805, and they do tours every weekday from 10:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. on the half-hour.
One of the visual highlights is a fire engine from 1926 - the Warren Harding administration, for you history buffs.
Kids love the antique fire engine, Hutchins said, and they used to need the truck to put out alcohol fires.
While Maker's Mark does not have a Dalmatian to go along with the engine, Hutchins said they have plenty of animals in Loretto, which she described as located "off the beaten path."
"We have a lot of dogs that come here. They like the bourbon. … They're local farmer dogs from the local farms. Very friendly."
Visitors to the distillery enjoy dipping their fingers into the vat before the bourbon is distilled, Hutchins said.
Relax. Before it's distilled.
However, the dipping-fingers-in-the-vat process doesn't always run smoothly.
"The craziest thing I've ever seen? Someone's sunglasses slipping off in to the vat and being lost," Hutchins said. "The vats are like 9,600 gallons, so you're not going to easily go down there and retrieve them."
The man in question would never see his shades again, and the people in charge simply told him, "Your glasses are gone."
"Of course they fished them out days later when they drained the vat," Hutchins said. "And so they would take the name and try to return the glasses. But he was very like, 'Oh no! Can you just go get 'em?' But of course we couldn't."
The other crowd favorites for the tour, Hutchins said, are sipping your less-than-one-ounce sample of bourbon and also the hand-dipping of your own 375-milliliter bottle at the end. Tour guests buy their bottle of bourbon, then seal it by dipping the top in hot wax.
"But you must be 21 and older to do that," Hutchins said. "And also to taste."
Maker's Mark bourbon. Always drink responsibly.
On to the picks!
Still clinging desperately to first place with a 39-21 record is Assistant Sports Editor Evan "Who doesn't know the names of all the Backstreet Boys?!" Drexler. Drex Factor, we've been waiting all semester for you to make sense. We're sick of it - and your German music.
Clawing his way to the top, in second place with a 38-22 record, is Karl "You went to Emory?! My wife goes there!" Hyppolite, who started having heart palpitations when he heard Kobe Bryant might have a knee injury.
The cream filling in this week's Oreo with a 37-23 record is Phil "Mr. Zimmerman" Kegler, whose UF women's basketball column spawned a response even longer and less coherent than the column itself from a crazy reader who didn't care enough to call him by the proper name.
Currently occupying the No. 4 spot in our lineup, with a 36-24 record, is Sports Editor Brian "My mom thought I was indigestion, or maybe gas pains" Steele, whose mother was in complete disbelief when the doctors said she was pregnant with him. Don't worry, Brian. At least you weren't an ass pain to your mother like you can be to us.
In dead-ass last place with a piss-poor record of 35-25, is Mike "What? Right now?" McCall, who was recently caught red-handed cheating on his one and only true love - Bojangles. A Zaxby's napkin was found in the back seat of his car, and his only explanation was that the illicit text messages advertising free chicken fingers were too much to keep him faithful.
| ED | KH | PK | MM | BS | AH | |
| VT-FSU | FSU | FSU | VT | FSU | VT | FSU |
| TTU-Kan | TTU | TTU | TTU | Kan | Kan | TTU |
| BC-UNC | UNC | UNC | UNC | UNC | UNC | UNC |
| Wake-Mia | Mia | Wake | Mia | Wake | Mia | Mia |
| UGA-LSU | LSU | LSU | UGA | UGA | UGA | UGA |
| OkSt-Tex | Tex | Tex | Tex | Tex | Tex | Tex |
| PSU-OSU | PSU | PSU | OSU | PSU | OSU | PSU |
| USC-Zona | USC | USC | USC | USC | USC | USC |
| USF-Louis | USF | USF | USF | USF | USF | USF |
UF-UK ED: UF 35-7; KH: UF 48-14; PK: UF 42-10; MM: UF 38-14 ; BS: UF 38-10; AH: UK
