Ah, the eight-to-eight. It's a date, a guaranteed hook-up and a secret friend all rolled into one.
An eight-to-eight is someone you only see between the hours of 8 p.m. and 8 a.m. It's a term I first heard from my friend, a self-proclaimed relationship escape artist.
The eight-to-eight isn't a booty call or a friend with benefits. They have duties similar to those of a boyfriend or girlfriend, such as making out and the occasional dinner, but because they are only seen at nighttime hours, they don't have the title.
The basis for the eight-to-eight is that he or she isn't seen or heard from during the day.
"They are your sort of boyfriend for 12 hours, and then they expire at 8 a.m., kind of like a 12-hour boyfriend-release tablet," my friend said.
The eight-to-eight works well for those suffering from a fear of commitment.
First, they offer companionship and entertainment when you are bored, whether it is a movie, dinner or just sex.
Second, an eight-to-eight is efficient. Because of the time restrictions, there's plenty of time to study, work and procrastinate.
Third, it is cheaper than your standard let's-hold-hands-and-skip relationship. Forget Valentine's Day and birthday gifts - those are for the suckers in love.
So those who are suspecting their relationship might be an eight-to-eight situation, just add up the signs: They don't answer your calls during the day, their friends are always surprised to see you or know you exist, and they hate receiving gifts mainly because they don't want to return the favor. If your significant other exhibits these signs, you're probably an eight-to-eight.
On the other hand, if you're afraid your eight-to-eight wants more than a casual, time-restricted love fest, then the law needs to be laid down before it gets worse. The last thing you need is to end up on "The Maury Show" getting yelled at by your angry girl about the time she wasted putting work into the relationship.
Bottom line: If you're a commitment-phobe on the go, consider getting yourself an eight-to-eight.
