What I learned at The Alligator: The scope of humanity through my lens

May 5th marks the end of my journey at UF, but it also marks the beginning of my unexpected journey here.

On a day much like today, at the end of the Spring semester two years ago, I was looking to add some “je ne sais quoi” to my college experience. I came across The Alligator’s website, and luckily, they were in need of photographers for the summer. They took a chance on me, a pre-med student, who did not know diddly-squat about journalism.

I remember the first call I got from Giuseppe, the editor-in-chief of The Alligator during my first semester working here. It was Sunday, June 12, 2016. He asked me to join him on the drive south to Orlando to cover the Pulse shooting, but I declined because I had to study for my organic chemistry exam. Twenty minutes passed, and I called him back. I didn’t understand what it was, but I knew I had to go. A sense of duty ensued.

I remember getting out of the car near the OneBlood Blood Donation Center and seeing the long line of people ready to donate. I remember walking along Orange Avenue. Every direction I faced there were countless expressions of frustration, desolation and anxiety. There was erratic breathing in the air as people heavily sobbed and tears trickled down their cheeks. We heard word of a small vigil at Lake Eola Park and followed a crowd of 200.

The sky was grey and eerie, and raindrops lightly sprinkled across the faces of the mourning. I saw how strangers lent each other a shoulder to cry on and how grief slowly turned into a powerful strength of love as each speaker lifted the spirits of those present. The commonality of grief among the crowd was one of the many things that unified them. Grief is a reflection of love, and when we lose people we love, it hurts. It hurts so much that it breaks us open, allowing us to be vulnerable and more willing to express our emotions. Words can’t describe how much love filled the air, but you could almost feel it pressing up against your chest. I failed my organic chemistry exam with a 59, but it was all worth it.

I remember being backstage at a local drag show where I witnessed the transformative nature of a drag queen. I saw her reflection in the mirror as she effortlessly blended her makeup, brushed her hair, glued her fake nails and strut across the stage in leotards, corsets and dresses all while wearing heels. I also remember feeling the fear in graduate student voices protesting on Turlington Plaza a recent federal visa and immigration ban brought upon by an executive order. The uncertainty of whether they would be able to stay in the country after completing their studies was petrifying. Although I’m not a student visa holder or a drag queen, documenting their challenges by photos and video provided me with a small glimpse into their world. For a few minutes, I felt what they felt. If it weren’t for The Alligator, I would have otherwise walked past the protest and thought nothing of it. Instead, I heard about people leaving Iran to find a better future for themselves and their families. Being there extended my own political and social concerns and allowed me to humanize each subject.

I remember getting accepted and it being one of the happiest moments during my college experience. I remember going out on my first assignment. I remember getting my first front page photo. Each time I was filled with a rush of self-actualization, and it made the corners of my lip squirm.

I remember how each editor has pushed me to be better, how nervous I was shooting my first football game in Death Valley, how each protest still gives me a rush of adrenaline and how Jimena and I ended up in Georgia on our way to Tallahassee (for a protest, of course).

Photojournalism has expanded my world. I have been made aware of my own privileges, but most importantly, I have learned about humanity. I have been taken outside of myself and become a better listener and a more empathetic person. There’s more to learn and experience in life besides organic chemistry, and little did I know, two years ago I would embark on my best experience at UF. Thank you, and see you later, Alligator.

Alan Alvarez is a UF psychology senior. He is the photo editor at The Alligator.